CHRONIC FATIGUE JOURNAL: DAY 37-39

WELCOME

I 've had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for almost five years.
Today I made the decision to start this online Journal, in the hope that it may be of assistance to others.
This disease really got the better of me this week.
I call it a disease because my body in definitely not at ease with this illness.
However when I say that, this disorder has been the reason behind my Spiritual Journey and my connection to God, in a much more simple way.
So here I am.
I meditate.
I breathe.
I speak and think positive thoughts.
Yet this week...
More fatigue...
Plus...
Plus...
So I found myself being extremely disappointed in my decline...
Anyone who has Chronic Fatigue, will relate to...
It's not about being tired or sleepy...
More like being in, a constant state of flu like symptoms...
No amount of sleep or relaxation helps...
So to go to my specialist and be given a lot of potential illnesses that can develop, sent me into more of a spin and even more disappointment in myself.
Perhaps up until this week, I may have been living in denial.
Most people don't even believe that it's an illness.
So now, I start again on a fairly strict regime of medication, low G.I. diet, limited sun and possible triggers of even more symptoms.
The hope is, that this regime will slow down or kill the bacteria that is responsible for this illness with-in my body.
So if you know of someone ,who may have Chronic Fatigue, or any other energy disorder, please be patient and kind to them...
In Love.
Rose

Day1 follows BELOW

THE THREE ASPECTS OF ME! (30.08.09)

While resting last night, the following became very clear to me, so I'll explain as simply as I remember it.
As most of you know I write on three different blogs and last night it became clear to me that some might think, how can this woman have Chronic Fatigue and still write entries elsewhere.
So...
My CF journal is very much about My Body...
My Breathing blog is about My Mind...
My I AM ROSE blog is My Spiritual connection to God....
All of these are aspects of Me, these blogs expose...
The Whole of Me...
My Body...Mind and Spirit.
How you might ask?
Read my entries and you'll find out.
The fatigue is what brought me to this place of... Stillness...Silence and Reflection...
So I thank the fatigue for this and I welcome the fatigue with Love...
It has served me well.
Now it is time to Live fully in...
The Now Moment.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

DAY 37-39

Hum!
The lesions on my middle finger and top part of my arm are cysts. Apparently the bacteria is dying off and this is how the little parasites die. Hum! That's good isn't it?
Over all the fatigue has been a bit more manageable, than it has been in months.
May be it's the relaxation and Chakra cd I'm doing everyday. I honestly don't know, just happy with feeling not so darn fatigued.
We had Alexis's 1st birthday party today, it was great. I really didn't have to do too much, only socialize, these days that can be a struggle, so to take it easy at intervals during the day was great.
To many carbs today, hum...
Still on limited Marshall Protocol, by this I mean I had to cut back on the B/P medication. The symptoms seem to be less severe in nature and the time it takes for recovery seems to be getting less.
So something happy to share with you all.
The beautiful photo of the birthday cake. (YUMMY!!!!)
Love and prayers to all.
In Love.
Rose